April 9, 2003

  • Do you remember me telling you that I was to be the new hancho from April? Well, today was my first chance to be in charge of the exciting recycling operation that takes place once a month.

    At precisely 6:45am I leapt 'enthusiastically' out of bed, winced as my ELP smacked against the floor and threw myself downstairs, into some clothes and out of the door in several very unfluid motions.

    At the little plot of land which doubles as neighbourhood rubbish dump and spillover carpark for the nearby temple, I found things already in full swing. There were three other hanchos already at work, guarding the large netting bags used for the collection of plastic bottles (clear), plastic bottles (coloured), polystyrene and sundry plastics, as well as the crates waiting for steel cans, aluminium cans, glass bottles (clear) and glass bottles (coloured).

    As the neighbours all woke up and began the task of disposing of their recyclable rubbish, we were there to help them and I am happy to report that I did you all proud. I said good morning to a large number of people that I had never noticed before and helped them to find their way to the correct receptacle, sometimes even helping them to empty their rubbish bags, if they looked like they needed such help and sometimes even if they didn't.

    The best bit about it was that I was presented with my very own yellow armband to wear, which proclaimed me a hancho, lest anyone think I was just some crazy gaijin who likes waking up at the crack of dawn (that one's yours, rache) and hanging around looking at other people's empty shampoo bottles. It might have been sleep in their eyes, but I like to think it was a new found look of respect that I saw when they noticed my yellow badge of authority...

    One old fellow of about a hundred and sixty five or so, I should think, came shuffling along, bent double with age and pushing a little trolley, in which were balanced precariously eighteen (I counted 'em as I threw them away for him) empty 2 litre bottles of shochu. As you'll see from the link, this stuff's about 50% proof on average and this constituted a serious amount of drinking for one wizened little old fellow of about a hundred and sixty five or so to do in a month....

    Anyway, I can report that it really is interesting having a look at other folks' garbage and I am now a fully fledged recycle technician but the buggers made me give back my armband at the end....

    Now, on to other things...

    First of all, I really appreciate the suggestions you made for my forthcoming trip. I'll let you know whether I manage to do any or all of them...

    And now to answer a few of the questions from the last blog...

    EroVeggie asks whether he can have my cookies if I die. Since I'm not planning to die, ever, the answer, sadly for him, is no.

    Ani Difrentdrumrco asked about BRN. Hmm...it's like this...if you ever hear from him, you'll know about it. As much as possible, he is kept securely under lock and key but sometimes, somehow, he manages to escape and there is always a lot of clearing up to do afterwards, so please, try not to encourage him....

    Dope Mama wondered about the financial arrangements behind the holiday. Well, my father in law is paying for the whole family (thirteen adults and children) to go out to celebrate his 60th birthday....

    The answer to the pertly benippled Aleph's question is more complicated. He wonders why it is that birds suddenly appear- everytime I am near. This is in part due to sheer animal magnetism but also has something to do with migratory patterns, though probably not very much....


Comments (19)

  • You just gotta add an edit for Reefz site... check it

  • congrats on that and on your newfound power. 

    So with your newfound yellow armband of power, when will your world conquest plans go into effect?

  • Remind me to do this on my 60th. Except since I'll have two kids in college at that point, perhaps I should be expecting my 80+yearold mother to be footing the bill.... Other people's garbage: what a way to start the day!

  • Damn, I'm thirsty...thirsty for a cosmo, and your company, and something "real", that is.

    I had so missed the frippery.

    It's a shame you had to give back the armband, but you know you don't need any of those trappings to lord over me.

  • Shochu...kind of like embalming fluid maybe?

    You know, it's one thing to be given some authority. But to be given authority and a yellow arm band...I don't know how you managed to hold up under the pomposity of it all.

    I'll try the bln radio later...dial-up are us.

  • Now ask your giri no chichi (neato-sounding name for just a father-in-law) if he wants Dope Mama to be his new best friend... or if he wants a spanking... (and if there is no gibo... I have a widowed mother you know!)... whaddaya think? You sure?

    What about? Uhm, okay then, never mind!

  • STRANGE BLOG......PRETTY KEWL THOUGH

  • mmm, the yellow armband is cool enough, i suppose, but think of the feeling of power and virility that would come from a yellow cockring.

    i said come. 

  • oooooooooo!! thE yellow armband of power. how enticing. i would be just quivering in joy, oh yes.

    ah, lil old men are great. they're just so adorable, esp. when they chug vodka (my friend's family is slavic, her grandfather is like 90 and still chugs vodka)

    peace

    *me*

  • Ahhhh the great lord Bob of the Yellow arm band regime! How wonderful that you have found such a worthy outlet of your excess energy my dear.  Tell me then great Lord, Does your amazingly large genetalia ever talk to you?  Give you instructions on how to bring about the downfall of mankind?  My pussy used to whisper secrets to me but lately has grown strangley silent. Things to ponder eh?

  • I think that the guy has lived to be 165 because he is pickled! 

    Sorry you had to give up the armband, hope you got plenty of pictures!

  • Very interesting stuff there. Good to hear that you can never be too old to enjoy a good drink.

    ~Shadow

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  • hope you're happy with your new power......don't be too corrupt....hehehe

    -ink

  • GOOD LORD! you are my hero.. *tears*... i silly string you tonite.

  •   Yellow armband or not, it seems to me that Whang needs to be trumped by the ELP.  You could probably sell tickets to that sword-fight.

  • Quid Pro Quo

    I still hear the lambs screaming.

    Clarice

  • Doing your part for internationalization, good on you!  I've always been amazed at the amount of shochu old guys in the village can put back, but then again, what else do they have to do?

    Fun fact - Kochi is one of the top prefectures for alcoholism and murdered women.  Coincidence?

  • do your garbage trucks play music like they do over here?

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